If you’ve ever looked into therapy for trauma, there’s a good chance you’ve come across the term EMDR. Maybe another therapist recommended it, you’ve heard someone talk about their experience with it, or you’ve seen those four letters listed on a therapist’s profile and wondered what they actually mean.

EMDR stands for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. It is a structured form of therapy designed to help people process distressing experiences and memories that continue to feel emotionally present, even when they happened a long time ago.

How Does EMDR Work?

One way of thinking about trauma is that sometimes an experience ends, but our system doesn’t fully get the message.

We may logically know that something is over while still noticing our body responding as though it isn’t. A particular conversation, relationship dynamic, sound, place, or seemingly small experience can bring up an emotional reaction that feels much bigger than what is happening in the present.

EMDR is designed to help the brain process experiences that may not have been fully integrated.

During EMDR, a therapist helps you identify a memory, experience, belief, or emotional response to work with while using something called bilateral stimulation. This most commonly involves moving the eyes from side to side, although alternating sounds or tapping may also be used.

Rather than simply talking through the experience from beginning to end, EMDR creates a structured process for noticing the memories, thoughts, emotions, beliefs, and physical sensations connected to it.

Over time, the goal is not to erase what happened. You still know the experience occurred. Instead, the memory may begin to feel more like something that happened in the past rather than something your mind and body need to keep responding to as though it is happening now.

Is EMDR Only for PTSD?

EMDR was originally developed for trauma and has been extensively studied as a treatment for post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

But trauma doesn’t always look like one obvious catastrophic event.

Sometimes the experiences that continue affecting us are things that happened repeatedly over time: growing up in an unpredictable home, experiencing emotional neglect, being bullied, living through a painful relationship, losing someone important, or repeatedly receiving messages that shaped how we learned to see ourselves.

For some people, the effects show up as intrusive memories or nightmares. For others, they may look more like anxiety, shame, difficulty trusting people, feeling chronically on edge, shutting down during conflict, or having emotional reactions that seem disproportionate to what is happening now.

EMDR can give us a way to explore the experiences underneath those reactions rather than focusing only on trying to make the reactions disappear.

What Happens During an EMDR Session?

EMDR isn’t simply sitting down and immediately beginning eye movements.

It is an eight-phase therapy that includes understanding your history, identifying what you want to work on, preparing for the processing work, developing ways to stay grounded, processing specific targets, and checking in over time about how things are changing.

Before beginning trauma processing, you and your therapist will spend time making sure you understand the process and have tools for managing emotions that may arise.

When you do begin processing, your therapist may ask you to bring a particular memory or experience to mind along with the thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations connected to it. You’ll then engage in bilateral stimulation while noticing what comes up.

There isn’t a particular thing you’re supposed to think or feel. Your therapist helps guide the process while allowing your own associations and responses to emerge.

Do I Have to Tell My Therapist Everything That Happened?

This is one reason some people are drawn to EMDR. While your therapist needs enough information to understand what you are working with and make sure EMDR is appropriate, EMDR does not necessarily require you to describe every detail of a traumatic experience out loud.

For someone who finds repeatedly telling the entire story overwhelming, or who simply doesn’t want to, that can feel different from some traditional approaches to trauma therapy.

Does EMDR Make You Forget the Trauma?

No. EMDR isn’t about deleting memories or convincing yourself that something painful wasn’t painful.

Ideally, what changes is the intensity attached to the memory.

You may still be able to remember what happened while noticing that the memory no longer brings the same emotional or physical response. You may also begin to relate differently to beliefs that developed around the experience, things like “I’m not safe,” “It was my fault,” or “I can’t trust anyone.”

Healing doesn’t require pretending the past didn’t happen. Sometimes it means helping the past feel more firmly located in the past.

Is EMDR Right for Everyone?

No therapy approach is right for every person.

Whether EMDR is appropriate depends on your experiences, current symptoms, emotional resources, goals, and what feels workable for you. A trauma-informed therapist should spend time getting to know you and helping determine whether EMDR makes sense rather than assuming that every person with a history of trauma needs the same treatment.

At Growing Together Counseling & Healing, we believe trauma therapy should be collaborative. EMDR can be one tool within a larger therapeutic relationship rather than a one-size-fits-all solution.

EMDR Therapy at Growing Together Counseling & Healing

Growing Together Counseling & Healing offers trauma-informed therapy for adults and teens in Hudson, Wisconsin and through telehealth, including EMDR and other approaches to trauma healing.

Jonna Phillips, LMFT, provides EMDR as part of her work with clients who are navigating trauma, difficult past experiences, relationship patterns, anxiety, and other experiences that may continue to feel present long after they occurred.

If you’re curious about EMDR, or you’re not sure exactly what kind of therapy would be most helpful, you don’t have to figure that out before reaching out. We can help you explore your options and connect you with a therapist who may be a good fit.